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Coffee...whimper...

Alright. It's day one. I want my fucking coffee. I am not as patient (what am I saying, I am never patient) but coffee helps.


I ate my chicken scramble omelet, my pear and my turkey bacon. I know that I only have 89 days left of no coffee.


Coffee, I love and miss you. I think the fact that I have winey kids doesn't help the no coffee thing either.


I assume it will get easier, but fuck day one sucks nuts.


I want my fucking coffee...whimper...

It's a head scratching-confused head tilt-can you smell me thinking kinda moment

The P90X box came yesterday.

I assembled the curl bar, and will have my dad help me mount the wall brackets (yeah, were that serious)

I flipped through the scary DVD's (there's about 12 of them) everything from some sort of karate, to psycho yoga, aerobics, and weight training.

If you haven't seen the infomercial on the P90X it's another weight loss system out there. It is saying that SO many diets, and work outs work right away, BUT after so long our body gets used to the program we are doing. It's like you get stuck where you are.

BUT the P90X system claims to be the system that keeps your body guessing, that I won't get used to one work out plan. It will change up often.

We received a nutrition guide book, a work out book, a calendar (I need to make a copy of so Spaghetti and I each have our own) so I can mark when and what we did. I also have access to the forum online.

At first I was scared. I saw a pumped up man, talking. And lots of men. One woman, who was a H.S. athlete and just needed to get in shape.

I needed to see a short, fat, mom. Someone who had baby weight or just weight in general. And there was a video online of a success story. The woman was over 200 lbs, and is now 147.

So to me that is more then I want to lose, so it is doable. Now I just need to do it.

Now don't get me wrong. Eating healthy, and just working out is great. And it does work.

Not for us.

For us it's a mental thing. I just can. not. bring myself to stop eating crap, and doing it 10 minutes before I crash to bed around midnight either. I eat ALL the time, hungry or not, boredom is usually the key to my eating (I know, when does Feisty ever get bored?)

I know for a fact that if I cook food, no matter what, Spaghetti will eat it. He just asks that someone just make him the food, and he will do good. I think he will be good at the food part, and I will be good at working out.

And since yesterday, in my spare time of attending to children, planning Stamp Camp, and just my everyday doings, I have been reading the P90X nutrition guide. It's a book that came with our big fat P90x system.

It's serious. Like NO pop serious. And NO junk food serious (what's the point of Halloween this year?!?)

And even though Spaghetti eats grilled veggies with a side of chicken 8 days a week, I am still doing that wrong. No more oils, and probably little or no sauces too. I need to saute in sherry or wines.

The book is really cool though, it really walks you through eating, and how important it is not to "feast or famine" I am good for that. Nothing like starving all day to eat a whole pizza with a side of Taco Bell drive through, and maybe some tums to top it all off. It goes over how we should NOT go by the scale only, since we will be trading fat for lean muscle.

It tells me how often to eat, what I can have of what foods, how much, and it has me calculate my calories I am allowed too. The only bad thing is, Spaghetti and I will probably end up in two different food categories. Good because I will be feeding us to proportion, but sucky because I will have to work at both of our diets then.

I did that fat pinchie test thingy. (that came in the box too) Ouch. It hurts a little. I tested, and checked the chart, I have 23% body fat. Not bad. (thank god this test was on my tummy and not my ass!)

I think I need just a week to get the gist off the eating, and work out system. I will be keeping this blog, and I hope that Spaghetti will at least journal his eating. (I guess I could do that for him too, since I am the cook!)

I think the no pop is going to hurt him, and I think the fact that my love for coffee with an extreme amount of sugar will hurt me the most.

90 days... wish us luck!

My weight story.

I was always blessed with a great metablism, eating what I want, and staying active.

After getting married in 2001, I was 110 lbs, a few years later I was working as a banker, sitting on my butt all day. Coming home to many happy nights of Fettachini Alfredo and t.v. wtih my husband, I put on weight.


I was up to 126.


Wanting to have children, I set a goal to get my weight down. After 6 months of walking daily, and just eating healthy I lost 16 lbs!


I became pregnant with our daughter, Mia in August of 2005, weighing in at 118. I gained 47 lbs with her pregnancy. And lost most of the baby weight before becoming pregnant in July of 2007 with our son Alexander. I was 122 then, and gained again another 47 lbs.


Three months after Alex's birth, my doctor said I was losing the weight and doing well. Just this August, I saw my doctor again, and weighed in 6 pound heavier then last year!


I am the heaviest I have ever been, and I am sad to say that I just eat more crap to make me feel better. I do drink mostly water, pop is only when I go out. I don't drink, or smoke. My bad habits are eating late, and just eating way to much! I need to watch my portions!


I am hoping to eat a large pizza before we start. I hope to be able to enjoy the foods that make me happy, but learn to control my portions. I also hope that with results, and weight loss, I can fit into those pre baby clothes, and just be comfortable in the skin I am in!

2/4/9 Morning

02/04/09
Wednesday Morning
Weigh in... 134.5

6:45 am awake with Weaky.

7:00 am Yoga/Pilate's abs and upper body (using the Gaiam ball and band with yoga mat) for one hour.

8:00 am breakfast was coffee, black with sugar. 6 oz of Yoplait Light Boston Cream Pie Yogurt.

10:00 am breakfast of 2 egg omelet (black pepper and garlic onion seasoning) 1 banana.

Motivation is key

I started over. I did. I'm proud.

It was Monday, February 2nd 2009.

I started over and wanted to have good reason, good motivation, and a few days under my belt before I blogged on it. (just incase...)

The first few days are HARD for me. I am talking crying, serious pouting with foot stomping and all. So I needed to just push through those first.




What motivates me, you ask?

1. Weaky's new DOC band he has to wear. If he must get into shape for the next 3-4 months. So will I. And hoping with 3-4 months of eating healthy, and exercise, I can be on such a roll that I don't ever stop.
2. My skinny jeans. I have them. I wore them in High School. (are you laughing at me?) I wear a size 11 jeans right now. I will fit into those H.S. jeans again. And if you really want to know they are a 1. Yep you read it right, don't wipe your eyes. A 1. One. Uno. Single. Sounds insane? To far of a goal? Who wears a size one? Well a 5 foot person can. And I will. (I did it about 4 years ago)
3. Outside of the skinny jeans, my wardrobe in general blows. I seriously have 1 pair of jeans, and a plethora of sweats, those are my clothes. Big t-shirts, sweatshirts, hoodies. Not hot. I have some cute little t-shirts I used to wear, and I will wear shorts again someday. Soon.
4. Swimming Pool. I got one. It was the end of last summer, so we only used it for about a month or so. Spaghetti and I are hoping for some sexy pool side bodies (or at least something less beached whale like)
5. My kids. I can keep up with them. I am not that bad. I do need to keep up with the kegal exercises so I can do the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse Hotdog Dance with out the possibility of wetting my pants.
6. Me. Of coarse this is the most important one, I want to be happy. I want to be able to raise my arms up to help my kid on a playground and if my tummy shows I don't care. I want to be able to run, ride a bike, and be active with my family. I miss the old me. I want to get her back.

I think I will be logging my diet, it may help me eat better. I will also be logging my work out too. Maybe some motivation if I see all that I have done, and not to mess it up.

I have to thank Jaci over at Ravings of a Mad Housewife, she is a mom, and a food lover like many of us. She is 5 weeks in and kicking ass. She just did this blog post about how much she loves to exercise. Not kidding.

So this is a start. With hoping for a finish at 107 pounds. It won't take me 3-4 months, it will take me more. (less would be fine too) but realistically I want to understand this won't happen overnight, but with Spagetti and me on a healthy diet. Spaghetti's parents on a light carb diet, and my parents on a light carb diet. We are all in this together. Maybe I can motivate someone else too!

(I would like to scan in some old pictures of the sinny bitch I used to be, with some of the fluffier pictures of me now)

Namastey.

So it's been a week.

A week of getting up at 6:30 am. No alarm. I just get up.
(Spaghetti gets off work at 6 and is home around then)

If I can get downstairs, and do my yoga alone, I do.
Otherwise, it is my am yoga with two cats (nothing like downward dog, and a cat tail to the face!) and Weaky in his bouncer!

I drink my coffee, get things ready for the morning (Spaghetti's food for his day job)
and I eat my oatmeal, or eggs and bananas.

Doing this routine has made me feel better, more awake and better about myself.

I don't cut carbs. I cut fried foods, and cut my portions. ALOT.

Pasta? That is a treat, I get a cup. A measured cup. Sigh... I could easily inhale eat a whole box of mac and cheese myself. But it has paid off.

I started this blog at 135.5 lbs... today... 130.5.

Yes I grinned like a very happy girl should. I am 5 lbs lighter. I feel better, and I am taking care of myself.

Starting on Monday the 12th (the original day of my new me. I was going to wait until then because of my girls weekend this weekend) I will be more serious about what I eat, no pop (really special treat) and try doing the Power 90 DVD from Spaghetti's coworker. (I watched Spaghetti do it last night. Not fun. Can you say yoga, weights, push ups and squats?)

I am proud of myself. I knew I could do it. I just have to try.

23.5 lbs to go!!